Hello Hello! So here I am-finally arriving at my very first blog post! Today is November 9, 2019, and by November 20, 2019 we will be leaving Oregon until who knows when our path will lead us back here. Things have been moving so swiftly I have hardly noticed them going by! I sincerely feel my subconscious has been doing quite a lot to prepare me for this next big chapter of my life about to transition for me. Each week passing by, each day floating along, emotions, thoughts, and vibrations are changing for me.
A few weeks ago, I began dreaming every single night. I do find it very important to keep a dream journal of some kind. I like to record them as soon as I wake up so that I can include as many details as possible; you never know what you'll need to reflect on, as well as that dream may very well have messages for a future point in time in case they do not completely make sense of at this time. I recall having 2-3 nights in a row of some more tormenting dreams regarding people very dear to me in my life (my partner, as well as my grandfather that has already passed). Experiencing these intense level of dreams (I nearly always seem to become very emotionally and physically involved in the dream lands that I travel through) gave me perspective, important messages to ponder on, and things to consider in day to day life. Since those few nights, my dreams have been very cheerful and fun. I believe in our dream worlds many things happen; 1) Our subconscious is very much attempting to work through issues or situations we are battling/dealing with in our conscious life (for any of you who are not already familiar, your subconscious can be compared to a recorder that has never stopped recording from this life and all other past lives you've had; it keeps track of all and everything that we have ever heard, gone through, seen, etc. Your conscious part of the mind is what your experiencing as you are awake right now). 2) There are many times we actually are in other dimensions and times doing spiritual work and helping on those planes, just to list a couple.
Over the last month or so I've had many moments of excitement, shock, sadness of saying goodbye to the past as well as the only home I have known the past 14 years, unbelievable happiness, and more. My partner and I have both left our day jobs a few weeks before expected to accept temporary work that is helping my love and I make much more money to prepare for the big trip, and how our new work life will be shifting. I feel so extremely blessed for having the co-workers I've had in my life the last year in the world of Urology, especially the tail-end of just before leaving, the people I was closely surrounded by really made my world; I will be forever grateful for you ladies! You've done more than you could probably ever know, and I hold much love in my heart for you along with all of the wonderful people I grew to know in that office. I have never known anything other than a grounded place to work for long periods of time like most of society nowadays; attempting to stay at one place as many years as possible to build rapport, and obtain raises as often as possible. before the last several months of my life I didn't ever think of the traveling lifestyle being realistic or possible for me, so this is going to be a wonderful, brand new experience, way of thinking and a new way of living. I truly feel that by sticking with what our "gut" (that voice that you so distinctly hear inside of you that guides you-however you may refer to that voice that never steers you wrong; God/Your Higher Self/Guardian Angels/Etc) says, we have the benefit of adapting to the traveling lifestyle by taking our first big leap of faith by letting go of our "secure" jobs and trusting the universe will always give us what we need to efficiently and effectively make it from one place to another. It was very scary, adrenaline rushing, and for me personally a clear physical step towards this big moment we've been inching closer and closer to.
There has been a lot to parting ways with friends and the little family I have near me. My partner and I did decide to have a gathering at a local bowling alley to say a final goodbye to all of the amazing people we have met while being here, and have come to love and care for. As for family close to us, my partner's whole family (including mother, father, and twin sisters) we will be stopping by in California along the way down to our first destination to spend a few days with, and my biological mother lives a couple hours away from where we currently live in Ashland Oregon on the Northern California Coast. What I've been doing the past month or a little more since my love and I have put a definitive date of when we are leaving, I've been driving to spend the weekends with her to really get in some quality time. This goodbye for me personally has been by far one of the most difficult on many levels for me. I love my mom so deeply. Throughout our life we've had our severe ups and downs, disconnections and connections, all leading up to growing that beautifully intense love you get as you begin to grow older, realize that time ticks away on this planet, and your know that our current bodies cannot hold our soul forever, and it's that much more important to spend so much time with your loved ones as possible before that time comes. I am BEYOND blessed to have such a strong, big hearted, loving mother that has brought me into this world. I have had to stare the facts in the face regarding my transition to travel the world; I have had to directly be aware of the fact that this being the best time of my life to leave, feels quite possibly the worst time of my mama's life for me to be leaving so far away. My mother has had growing osteoporosis in her back and neck most of my entire life, she has a few vertebrate's missing in her spine, as well as slowly disintegrating in her neck that has caused her much physical difficulties in life. When I was 9 years old, the doctor's wanted her in a wheelchair, and as I stand before you today at 31 years of age, she still has never been in a wheelchair at all. Despite all of her worry, very much need of help with cleaning, cooking, and the expected things that she needs assistance with, she has shown me nothing but love and support for me fulfilling my soul by traveling and discovering myself throughout my travels. I have cried and felt so very much moving through the realities of all of this happening.
Anyhow, I know this being my very first blog it's been a long enough read, I am so grateful for you taking the time and love out to hear my thoughts. I know I have actually only touched on the tiniest few things on my mind that I'd love to express and talk about, I know my thoughts have been a little bit all over the place to go through a few things with you, so I'll save some for more focused posts here in the near future. As I type this I am with my mama at the coast and am so happy to be able to be with her. This is officially the last weekend I am visiting with her before beginning my journey, next weekend we will be meeting with our friends at the bowling alley, and the following Tuesday or Wednesday we will be embarking to the open road!
Much Love, Light, and Happiness to all! Blessed be, and cannot wait to share again soon! XO
ps.
please forgive my face in the photo! Didn't realize until after looking through these photos that I was so in shock and excitement that we had REALLY just purchased our home, I was trying so hard not to cry, and realized I actually look terrified in the picture lol. I am just really excited and trying not to cry.
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